They Carry My Heart

I became a mother in 1996. I became a mother of 2 in 1999.

 

These 2 little bundles of perfection....are still perfection, each in his own way. They amaze me, they delight me, they frustrate me, and they piss me off. I am awed by their eyelashes, their fingers, their laughs, the dirt on their neck, the scratches on their legs, they way they play together and the way they beat the snot out of each other, the smell of their hair, both when they are sweaty after a ball game and clean, fresh out of the shower. I still am moved by watching them sleep, sprawled out on their beds, limbs askew and tangled in the sheets. I wonder where they go and what they dream.

They are both at the point where they don't need me like they once did. And that is the way it should be. I can feel Payne, especially, pulling away and looking for his own way. Figuring out things on his own. Searching for his own paths, his own dreams and goals. But have we taught them enough? Have we taught them to be kind? Will they be good and honorable men? It is frightening how much they still have to learn, and how little time we have left with them under our roof. 5 years + a few months is all that remains of our nuclear family of 4 together.

I am thankful for each and every moment with them. Each boy is such a joy to me, each day with them a simple gift.

In that vein of thinking, here is a video that made me a whimpering puddle of tears.

It's already been a good Mother's Day Weekend. My car is clean and vacuumed, the yard is mowed, a fresh bouquet of flowers is on the table, and some jasmine is planted. The boys are off to a playoff baseball game and I have a couple of hours alone to work. It's the ordinary days, indeed.

Comments

[sonya]

loved the video -- thanks for sharing.